I myself have been caught up from time to time in something that has happened in my past and re-experiencing all of those emotions attached to it. Regret, despair, anger, anxiety…
I run through the event as it haunts me, and I wonder to myself why it keeps popping in my mind. Why didn’t I do this, or that? Why did (or didn’t) I say that? Why did that happen to me?
When we allow those memories to hold on to us that way and create those emotional (and sometimes physical) responses, it can cripple us. Cause inaction, or worse yet, wrong action.
It’s time to take control of those memories and see them for what they are. Learning experiences. You can’t go back and alter the events, so dwelling on them for any other purpose is fruitless. Simply learn from them.
If that memory is bothersome to you because of your own fault, ask the person or persons you’ve injured for forgiveness. If they refuse, at least the ball is in their court. You’ve done all you can. Let it go.
If you’ve only hurt yourself, then by all means, it’s time to forgive yourself and move on. Let it go. If others have hurt you, forgive them and let it go.
Once you let go of the emotions attached to that memory, all you are left with is the learning experience it provides. Next time you’ll say the appropriate thing. Or take the appropriate action. At the very least, you’ll avoid doing whatever it was that you did wrong in the first place.
Simply tell yourself, “the past is the past… I can only learn from it.” And mean it.
Photo By Mr. Littlehand